It was a glorious day. Hot as usual. The temperatures reaching the higher nineties and it was Kristen and my day out. We planned to see the Sex and the City movie… have lunch… play tennis…the typical day out schedule. So as we’re driving we get the idea to get some ice cream. I mean it’s hot as balls outside why not?
We go to L&G Dairy in Mount Vernon (if some of you are familiar you would understand why this is a top-notch choice). We walk in, the air conditioning hits us, and then the anxious family cuts us. Great. Of course there is only one person working the counter and the ever so tempting ice cream makes the time go by so much slower. It’s finally our turn we step up to the counter to be greeted by the creepy ice cream scooper guy. Everyone knows this type…hard rocker…long black scraggily hair…you pray he doesn’t actually touch any part of the ice cream you will consume…etc..etc…
After viewing the selection and pricing the amounts we both decide to get two scoops. I mean the last time we went we were gypped and they had my favorite, chocolate cookies and cream (chocolate ice cream with Oreo’s)!!! So creepy scooper guy starts scooping my ice cream and he does this huge scoop. I’m thinking awesome that’s the perfect cone, but oh… it doesn’t stop there. He keeps scooping until the second scoop (completely outside the cone) is about the size of my head!! No joke. I immediately start laughing because I’m just in shock for how I’m going to eat all this ice cream and I tend to laugh at everything. Kristen, even after seeing how much ice cream I got, still orders two scoops.
We pay for the cones and walk out the door carrying our cones as if we were lady liberty. An old man sees us in our splendor and says “I don’t know how you guys will be able to eat all of that!” and Kristen’s response is “Oh…well you’d be surprised!” We get in the car and start to drive…Kristen’s driving…and we instantly know there is a problem. The hot weather and huge cones don’t seem to mix well. We start to race for time in eating our cones before they melt all over us. I start to notice how suddenly the car starts to keep inching closer and closer to the shoulder, but of course I can’t say anything because I’m trying to eat my melting cone! Kristen is so profoundly focused on her cone that the car starts cutting into the grass… then above the curb… and then over driveways. This is when I realized oh shit maybe I should say something. So I scream “hey” in my breathless laughing fit and Kristen quickly gets back on the road. She then looks over at me and says, “yeah we should probably pull over”
There we are sitting in our little black car in the hot sun eating our rapidly melting ice cream cones. I keep stopping to say I can’t eat all of this and Kristen continues to give me the motivational “you can do it” sayings. It gets to the point that Kristen has gotten her cone under control while mine is still lopsided and melting all over me. Kristen, as the trooper she is, takes my cone and makes my ice cream more manageable too…what a good friend! In the end I had ice cream dripping off my chin, on my nose, all over my hands and every where around my mouth. Yes I probably looked like a special child, but damn that was good ice cream!
